I first met Nick Klaus in
1993. Back then he was already a strapping boy of maybe 9 or 10 years of age,
full of life and smiles, eager to learn and satisfy his endless curiosity. But
he was also terribly mischievous and, as a result, had gotten himself into a
tricky situation. From what I understand, he had managed to get stuck inside a
photo album, where, to free himself, he had to discover the Outmoded Landscape,
where the children of Mr. Crutchfield had gone missing. The slip,
as he called it, started after he came across a forgotten camera in
Mr. Crutchfield’s stable. What happened then? The picture becomes blurred. If
I understand it clearly though, he was supposed to discover the Outmoded
Landscape to free . . . Hold on a minute. I’ve just written that . . . So you
see what sorts of mind pranks I am dealing with when I am dealing with Nick
Klaus.
Since getting stuck
in the photo album, I don’t believe Nick has grown older. How do I know that?
For a start, I don’t believe anyone has ever gotten older by having his or her
picture taken. For a second start, I do believe that once the picture is
taken, whoever has been photographed will remain the age he or she is in
that picture forever. And for a finishing start, I’ve noticed over the years,
especially as the end of the year draws near, how Nick Klaus seems to grow
restless. His increased activities consist in writing me
numerous letters. They are always hand-written with the same noticeably shaky
bubbly letters of a young writer. Now if that is not the most irrevocable
evidence of someone not getting older, I don’t know what is. You may ask, but
why does he write to me towards the end of the year? I haven’t been able to
figure that one out, yet. Maybe it is because Nick Klaus rhymes with Santa Claus?
Which of course is a silly deduction.
Still the question readers
ask me the most is: Where is Nick Klaus now? No one knows for sure. I certainly don’t know. But he must be
on his way to solve his problems. He has to. His parents have been waiting for
him ever since he slipped, and I’m sure that he can’t wait to see them
again. Who wants to remain stuck in an album of photos forever? So all I know is that one day, he will come back. But my guess is that before he gets to come back,
he may have to go through a lot more adventures, like visiting the land of Never
Mind, or help a young girl's father to find work in the Dream Factory, and so on.
Meanwhile, rumor has it that he may have been
turned into a frog. I personally remain skeptical. Do frogs talk or write
letters? I’ve
never heard of one. Mind you, I’ve been told too that in the land of fables
spotting a frog writing fables would not be unusual at all. So if you do come
across a frog writing fables you may have found Nick, and implore you to let me know at
once.